“Accountable for your conduct.”  That Is on my mind.  What does that mean? To Me? Have I been accountable for my conduct at this late date when it is too late to change? OK, let’s review for a moment. I am from Georgia, having lived most of my life in Los Angeles, California. I now live in Paris, France. I am in the golden years of my life.  And looking out my window on the lower half of the 16ème arrondissement of Paris.  According to my information, it is called “AUTEUIL NORD”. 

I retained a new French accountant this week, and he told me that this area was originally a small village outside of Paris.  It became part of Paris during (my mind tuned out here) and is now part of the city.  (mind tuned back in).  Yet, it still feels like a little village with lots of residential areas. Upscale.  YES.  My mind liked all I was hearing. 

I don’t plan to move for a while, especially when there is no where I can go. Haha.  LOCKDOWN!!  THEN I noted that I can ask him at another time to fill in the facts.  AND, I hoped that that “upscale” would not affect my Retainer fee. Haha.

OK. And, now that I am in Paris (where I have always wanted to be), retired from the law, active in the entertainment industry, and in my “golden years”, my entire life is on review. Haha. Opps. “Have I been accountable for my conduct?” Hmmmmmmmm. I have spent my entire life blaming myself for everything BAD that has happened to me or my children or my significant other (????) or his children (??) and I am now having a lot of bad dreams. Well, I have thought and thought and thought. And, this is what has come to me (at this moment in time).

I always told my factual truth. Even when I knew it would get me in trouble then or later. And when it would get me in trouble, I would blame myself for the repercussions. Right? WRONG! I did what I needed to do. I told the truth. They just did not like it or believe me or agree or……. Now, I could have kept my mouth shut. Or lied. Or Made Nice. Who? Me? Not have an opinion? Lie? Make nice? Never going to happen.

For some inexplicable reason, I can breathe again. I am sure I will be jogging by spring.

Duh, you say. NO. THIS IS A BIGGIE!!!! FOR ME!! I miss friends and family of yesteryear, but I said or did things that they did not like or agree with or (if they are still alive)……, and here I am. I am so happy, I will post some pretty photographs and funny memes and cartoons. Each one will be my version on some truth. And you may not like it. Who cares at this late date. At least, if no one remembers me, they might remember something I say. Or said. Good and bad. Haha. YES, I was accountable for my actions. I don’t take any of it back.

And, now to sleep, and maybe to dream…….

Best and From Paris with Love, Jay

Published by jjaywmac

Jay W. MacIntosh (born Janet Tallulah Jewell) is a retired attorney, actress, and writer from the United States, living in Paris, France. She is a member of the California Bar and selected to the 2018, 2019, 2020 Southern California Super Lawyers list. She holds a Master’s Degree in Drama from the University of Georgia and is a member of Phi Beta Kappa, Phi Kappa Phi, and Zodiac Scholastic Society. As an actress, she is a member of The Actors Studio, the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences (ATAS), SAG-AFTRA, and ASCAP, performing in film and television in the United States and France. Her published works include Journal of Janet Tallulah, Volume 1, Journal of Janet Tallulah, Volume 2, The Origins of George Bernard Shaw’s Life Force Philosophy, Moments in Time, Capturing Beauty, JAYSPEAK on the Côte d’Azur, and Janet Tallulah.

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