NOVEMBER begins with pet-PEEVES AND BLESSINGS…..

As I sit here getting ready to write, I remember how much I don’t like this MAC that I have been using ever since Steve died in 2016, and I still don’t like it.  I always prefer my PC.  But I have used this one because it was brand new when he died and so I have tried to make it my own and now have important documents on it.  As important as my life gets these days.  

I have several things I want to write about today.  First, I will bitch and complain – about the MAC, about the rain outside, about Halloween, about …… the list goes on.  Bottom line, I don’t like Halloween.  I don’t find anything about it “fun”.  I always found it to be a “mean” holiday about mean things done by mean people to people that were supposed to be funny or whatever. I did not like the “carnivals” at Candler Street School.   I only liked the cake walks.  I always hoped that I would win some mother’s homemade Lemon-cheese cake.  Yummy.  But I would take home what I won, and it would be homemade.  I just did not like “Angel Food”.  I loved cocoanut. (Only Southerners will know what I am talking about.)  And I hated dressing up as some stupid pirate or witch. I NEVER liked “costume” anything (except acting wardrobe). I did not want to pretend I was mean or looked mean or wanted to trick you, or any of it.

But I will cut to the chase to spend time writing about my new positive spin that I now put on each day. “I am willing to let LIFE love me today. And one way I am willing to let LIFE love me is by writing this blog and including my favorite photos for all to see.” I took these photos during the pandemic when I was staying at a friend’s studio in the Sixth Arrondissement last year (2020). I love each shot and had great fun taking them.

And, now, for the Closer — I know better than to give “advice”, but I am sharing these thoughts as several “suggestions” because I like it. I edited it and think of it often…..

FOR THOSE WHO ARE 80-yrs OLD AND older, PLEASE READ THIS.

This is for you. I really like what is said here and am going to try my best to follow it. Thank you to the person who wrote this.  I have made a few changes.   May God bless us all as we strive to be a blessing to others at this age, especially to our children — if possible. 

Between 80 and death. It’s time to use the money you saved up. Use it and enjoy it. Don’t just keep it for those who may have no notion of the sacrifices you made to get it. Remember there is nothing more dangerous than a son or daughter-in-law or daughter and son-in-law with big ideas for your hard-earned capital. Don’t feel bad spending your money on yourself. You took care of your children for many years, and you’ve taught them what you could. You gave them an education, food, shelter, and support. The responsibility is now theirs to earn their own money.

Keep a healthy life, without great physical effort. Do moderate exercise (like walking every day), eat well, and get your sleep. It’s easy to become sick, and it gets harder to remain healthy. That is why you need to keep yourself in good shape and be aware of your medical and physical needs. Keep in touch with your doctor, do tests even when you’re feeling well. Stay informed.

Always buy the best, most beautiful items for your significant other (if you have one.)  Or yourself. The key goal is to enjoy your money.  

Don’t stress over the little things. You’ve already overcome so much in your life. You have good memories and bad ones, but the important thing is the present. Don’t let the past drag you down and don’t let the future frighten you. Feel good in the now. Small issues will soon be forgotten.

Regardless of age, always keep love alive. Love life, love your family, love your neighbor and remember: “A man or woman is not old as long as he or she has intelligence and affection.”

Be proud, both inside and out. Don’t stop going to your hair salon or barber, do your nails, go to the dermatologist and the dentist, keep your perfumes and creams well stocked. When you are well-maintained on the outside, it seeps in, making you feel proud and strong.

Don’t lose sight of fashion trends for your age, but keep your own sense of style. You’ve developed your own sense of what looks good on you – keep it and be proud of it. It’s part of who you are.

ALWAYS stay up-to-date. Read newspapers, watch the news. Go online and read what people are saying. Make sure you have an active email account and try to use some of those social networks. You’ll be surprised at what old friends you’ll meet.

Respect the younger generation and their opinions. They may not have the same ideas as you, but they are the future and will take the world in their direction. Give suggestions, not criticism, and try to remind them that yesterday’s wisdom still applies today. Don’t use the phrase: “In my time.” Your time is now. As long as you’re alive, you are part of this time.

Some people embrace their golden years, while others become bitter and surly. Life is too short to waste your days on the latter. Spend your time with positive, cheerful people, it’ll rub off on you and your days will seem that much better. Spending your time with bitter people will make you feel older and harder to be around.

Do not surrender to the temptation of living with your children or grandchildren (if you have a financial choice, that is). Sure, being surrounded by family sounds great, but we all need our privacy. They need theirs and you need yours. Even then, do so only if you feel you really need the help or do not want to live by yourself.

Don’t abandon your hobbies. If you don’t have any, make new ones. You can travel, hike, cook, read, dance. You can adopt a cat or a dog, grow a kitchen garden, play cards, checkers, chess, dominoes, golf.

Try to go. Get out of the house, meet people you haven’t seen in a while, experience something new (or something old). The important thing is to leave the house from time to time. Go to museums, go to walk through a park. Get out there.

Speak in courteous tones and try not to complain or criticize too much unless you really need to. Try to accept situations as they are.

Pains and discomfort go hand in hand with getting older. Try not to dwell on them but accept them as a part of life.

If you’ve been offended by someone – forgive them. If you’ve offended someone-apologize. Don’t drag around resentment with you. It only serves to make you sad and bitter. It doesn’t matter who was right. Someone once said: “Holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Don’t take that poison. Forgive, forget, and move on with your life.

Laugh. Laugh away your worries Remember, you are one of the lucky ones. You managed to have a life, a long one. Many never get to this age, never get to experience a full life.

I have a dream that I repeat to myself every day.  Outrageous and expensive and wonderful.  Who knows?  There is time.  So no memes. IT HAS GOTTEN TO BE A MEME-CRAZY WORLD OUT THERE. CAUTION IS SUGGESTED.

THAT’S ALL, FOLKS!

BEST, Jay

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Published by jjaywmac

Jay W. MacIntosh (born Janet Tallulah Jewell) is a retired attorney, actress, and writer from the United States, living in Paris, France. She is a member of the California Bar and selected to the 2018, 2019, 2020 Southern California Super Lawyers list. She holds a Master’s Degree in Drama from the University of Georgia and is a member of Phi Beta Kappa, Phi Kappa Phi, and Zodiac Scholastic Society. As an actress, she is a member of The Actors Studio, the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences (ATAS), SAG-AFTRA, and ASCAP, performing in film and television in the United States and France. Her published works include Journal of Janet Tallulah, Volume 1, Journal of Janet Tallulah, Volume 2, The Origins of George Bernard Shaw’s Life Force Philosophy, Moments in Time, Capturing Beauty, JAYSPEAK on the Côte d’Azur, and Janet Tallulah.

4 thoughts on “NOVEMBER begins with pet-PEEVES AND BLESSINGS…..

  1. Happy November to you. I enjoyed your blog today and agree with you on Halloween. I’ve never liked it & I dread tomorrow night and will keep my light off and not go to the door. There’s plenty of parties in town for kids to go to.
    It’s a night the adults do bad things.
    I love your photos and they bring back many memories for me. Most of them with my husband.
    Take care of yourself ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

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