ON MY MIND THIS MORNING (August 15, 2020)…..

“Without freedom, you have nothing left.”  (from Hong Kong.)  I quit!  “This year, “character is on the ballot.”  I agree.  “No one sees us. It is like we don’t exist.”  (from Belarus). 

Bottom line, I have reached overload.  MY being “emotionally vested” has reached a saturation point.  Sorta. 

But, I cannot love, care, and be a nice person all at the same time, so I must simplify and choose.  I cannot do it all. 

As far as I am concerned, most of us don’t know how good we have it. We should be so lucky to have honest people helping us. And, if we turn it down and become a one-party system because of a man and a group of men who cheat, we deserve all the harm that comes our way. Sorry But character is on the ballot. And without freedom, we have nothing left. And, our character is currently questionable. We are in danger of becoming a one-party state. I heard an international commentator say that the problem with America is not the leadership, but the American people who vote leaders into power.

I must take time out. I am trying to move and it is very difficult. I have no energy. And, I am so discouraged by the news EVERYWHERE. I am on Facebook less because ….. well, you know why because. I watch the news less. And, you know why because. I pack…. and pack…. and pack….. and STILL have too much.


I don’t want to write how I feel. I will feel better AFTER this move this week. I am very concerned because the space is small. And I have things that are problems – the piano, the cat, the trains, dishes, silver, furs, jewelry. All things I cannot part with. Not yet.

Wish me luck.

No one in France wants this stuff. I see people with huge homes in the USA and big cars. I have let all of that go. But, I am still holding on to the last vestiges of what I used to think was “me”. Haha. NO.

The news reminds me daily that I may have to pick up and go suddenly. Without warning. You may, too. All of us in our complacency, blithely thinking that things will get better.

Things may get worse.

OK. I will sign off for now because I am not in a very good space right now. Stay tuned………..

Best, Jay

Published by jjaywmac

Jay W. MacIntosh (born Janet Tallulah Jewell) is a retired attorney, actress, and writer from the United States, living in Paris, France. She is a member of the California Bar and selected to the 2018, 2019, 2020 Southern California Super Lawyers list. She holds a Master’s Degree in Drama from the University of Georgia and is a member of Phi Beta Kappa, Phi Kappa Phi, and Zodiac Scholastic Society. As an actress, she is a member of The Actors Studio, the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences (ATAS), SAG-AFTRA, and ASCAP, performing in film and television in the United States and France. Her published works include Journal of Janet Tallulah, Volume 1, Journal of Janet Tallulah, Volume 2, The Origins of George Bernard Shaw’s Life Force Philosophy, Moments in Time, Capturing Beauty, JAYSPEAK on the Côte d’Azur, and Janet Tallulah.

4 thoughts on “ON MY MIND THIS MORNING (August 15, 2020)…..

  1. Reblogged this on JAYSPEAK and commented:

    It is now Sunday, and I feel better. The rain cooled everything off. I am actually beginning to get excited about being in a new environment. Even the cat seems to feel better. For whatever it is worth. Stay alert, Everyone.


    1. I will be fine. You keep finding what feeds your soul, too. There may be rough days ahead. For both of us. You will be fine. You and Bob are both survivors. I am a survivor. All of our kids and grandkids are survivors. We will all be OK. And it may not be what we used to think was ok. Janet

      Liked by 1 person

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