What a glorious September morning in Paris! I am sitting here in my new apartment in the 16th Arrondissement of Paris, aware that I feel good and am hunkering down. I just had a small breakfast and coffee on the balcony and remembered that I need to start a blog for this weekend. Actually, that is not true because I have given it a lot of thought. After the news of RBG’s death pierced my very being, I did not know what I wanted to write. “May her memory be for blessing. May her memory be for revolution. May we become a credit to her name.”

And, I have thought about why I feel so good in the midst of all of this turmoil and despair.  This is what comes to mind.

  1. I moved to Paris as an experiment, hoping that it would JOLT me out of the doom and gloom depression that I was carrying around in my head. IT WORKED!!! Life has been nothing but a lot of problem -solving moments since I made that decision. Needless to say, it has not been easy. Granted, I have seen a lot of beautiful things since I have been here and eaten a lot of delicious food. I have met a lot interesting people and made a few good friends. But I have experienced most of it at the same time I – for some unknown reason- was going through a lot of physical pain when I have wanted to travel metros and ride buses and see and do and go. AND I have been in the middle of a pandemic. I don’t know how much was real and how much was imagined. I was renting a Studio in the middle of one of the most desirable sections of Paris and was in fear for my life during all of LOCKDOWN. Not really, BUT it jolted me out of imagined doom and gloom and converted it to literal doom and gloom with a killer virus outside my door. Also, I was jolted out of imagined pain to literal physical pain because of the terrible mattress on the Studio’s sofa bed. Haha. It changed my inability to speak a language sorta well to a real inability to communicate when I most needed to. Haha!!! And, it motivated me to try to find a more comfortable apartment FAST, because I wanted to sleep in a bed in a room without bars on the windows for safety. So, I did not have time to walk around with imagined doom and gloom! I was in the midst of REAL doom and gloom! And with the mess that was going on the USA, it got worse just when I thought it couldn’t get worse. And, it is still getting worse!!! My beloved practice of law with civil rights for the little guy has turned inside-out for my colleagues in their pursuit for justice in employment litigation and civil rights. And it is redefining itself and they are redefining their practices and their litigation as they go after bullies of one kind or another.
  • I feel good because I see and hear the youth of tomorrow’s voices. Yes, there are rotten apples in the barrel, BUT there are a LOT of young people who see clearly and have the vision to take the world of tomorrow in other directions. I trust that there are solutions that I cannot even imagine. I have made the decision to trust that they know what they are doing. I trust in the youth of tomorrow. I see my four grandchildren (who don’t know me because of my having kept a distance for some reason that I don’t understand – that is a post for another time) and see their decisions and posts on social media. I applaud their choices of healthy food. I applaud their love for nature, and more.

So, I am going to allow myself to feel good in spite of all that is bad (which I will not list.) Maybe I am grasping at straws here, but it is September! I love September and October and November and December!!!!! I am in an apartment with my art on the walls. AND, I am alive!! And the holidays are coming !

My cat is better. My pain is bearable. I have a new doctor I like. I will have my ballot to vote on Thursday (California). I visited with some GHS classmates on Zoom that I enjoyed. I am working on solutions to snags. I found a tailor for my Armani suits (too expensive, too long, different body shape and sizes). The French Open begins tomorrow down the street. Life is good AT THE MOMENT. By the time you read this, it may all have changed. (sigh).

SO, I have taken some pictures of things – food, flowers, views, art that I think you may enjoy. I plan to do more photo’s in the future.

Jayspeak in Paris is redefining itself.  Don’t go away.  The Kaleidoscope is turning…….

Best, Jay

Help Jayspeak.

I hope I don't offend you by asking for help. But help is what I need these days. I wish I were independently wealthy, but I am on my own with expenses - as I guess we all are - with Social Security and small SAG pension. So, I am posting this on Jayspeak to defray costs of getting doctors and workers for the apartment and getting help when I need it. Sorry.


Published by jjaywmac

Jay W. MacIntosh (born Janet Tallulah Jewell) is a retired attorney, actress, and writer from the United States, living in Paris, France. She is a member of the California Bar and selected to the 2018, 2019, 2020 Southern California Super Lawyers list. She holds a Master’s Degree in Drama from the University of Georgia and is a member of Phi Beta Kappa, Phi Kappa Phi, and Zodiac Scholastic Society. As an actress, she is a member of The Actors Studio, the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences (ATAS), SAG-AFTRA, and ASCAP, performing in film and television in the United States and France. Her published works include Journal of Janet Tallulah, Volume 1, Journal of Janet Tallulah, Volume 2, The Origins of George Bernard Shaw’s Life Force Philosophy, Moments in Time, Capturing Beauty, JAYSPEAK on the Côte d’Azur, and Janet Tallulah.


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