WE ALL HAVE A STORY

Lately, I have seen a lot of posts and gotten a lot of emails wanting me to share my story and it might be used somewhere.  Which story do you want me to share?  I have several stories.  My early years.  Candler Street Grammar School.  My teens.  My family of origin. My ancestors. My aunts and uncles and cousins. Dating.  College – University of Georgia.  Scholastics.  Sex.  Me, too experiences.  Scholastic achievements.  Honors.  1^st marriage – Darrell William MacIntyre.  Sex.  Me, too experiences.  Motherhood.  Bullies.  Abused wife syndrome. Leadership.  Adult Child of an Alcoholic.  Daddy.  Daughter of a prominent man. Growing up in a small town.  Friends and so-called “friends”.  2^nd marriage William Wood Bell.  Co-alcoholic/enabler.  Step-motherhood.  Career in film & television.  Compulsive-obsessive personality.  Physical history.  Goals in Life. 3^rd marriage Willard Douglas Uhler. Divorce, in general.  Christianity.  Religious Abuse.  4^th marriage Felice Steven Orlandella.  Addictions.  Fantasies.  Ageing.  Sports History.  My love of the Law.  Why I changed my name, legally.  Writing. My publications.  My musical history. Singing. Moving to Paris.

You get the picture.  What should be the focus on “my story”?  In my bio, I say, “My name is Jay W. MacIntosh, attorney/actress/wife/mother/grandmother/writer/…. and the list goes on.  Yet, with everyone having health problems these days, I think we all need to share with someone who will really listen – our story.  That is why I spent one of my posts trying to make my grandmother and my grandfather (Lillie and Glenn) into a couple with their own lives and problems.  Who were they?  I didn’t ever really know each one of my husbands.  I don’t really know who my children are.  I don’t really know who my friends are.  People seldom share their stories.  Only now, when I am in the advancing years of my life in Paris in lockdown with no end in sight, do I even spend thought-time, pondering who my mother really was.  I mean as a young girl with hopes and dreams, and her difficulties with motherhood and an unfaithful, good-looking alcoholic successful husband with a great personality.    Who was Daddy, really?  I can tell you who I think he was.  No one stops to think beyond who THEY THINK a person is.  What arrogance!!!  No one really knows who a person is.  THEY THINK THEY DO.  Not true.  Wrong. 

So, now, I am living in Paris, France, in the middle of a lot of beauty and a lot of fear.  I am somewhere in the middle – loving the beauty and working with my own fear.  Actually, I am trying not to think so much.  I am “doing it anyway”.  Doing what anyway.  Walking, exercising.  Brushing my hair. Writing. Shopping.  Making a lot of lists Haha.  I LOVE making lists.  This week, I set a routine.  Get up, do 40 minutes of stretches in bed and on the yoga mat. Feed the cat. 

Put on my Asics, walk the loop (almost a mile – sorta around the block).  Explore a tad – walking at least one mile.  Take pictures to post.  Look up at the sky.  Breathe.  Figure out where is East, West, North, South.  Eat breakfast. Clean kitchen.  Work on projects, lists, ideas, books.  Eat. Read.  Think.  Write.  Nap.   (Actually, the day passes very quickly.)  Watch Evening News.  Eat. Watch a show (I pick a series I like and watch one episode.  Right now, I am finishing up Father Brown. Haha.  I cannot watch anything too heavy.  I get too upset.)   Watch Christiane Amanpour.  Go to bed. Read my phone until I turn off the light and try to sleep.  I just wander through the day.  I sign up for seminars, but I cancel before the time.  Maybe I will begin follow-through at some point.  I have always like being alone.  So, this is not too hard for me.  I enjoy reading, studying, writing, thinking. 

My walks are fun.  This week, I took some pictures.  Out my front door.

 

Down or up to the Odeon (not sure what happens there but it is a beautiful building).

Up the street to the Jardin de Luxembourg. (See how close it is to my apartment . People run around it and get exercise.  Beautiful flowers.

 

I peer through the gates with my camera and take photos without the bars (in the shadows).   

Across the square (which has a name but I am not sure what it is). 

This is a restaurant I ate dinner and breakfast in before lockdown.  It is run by cute young people who are from the South and features Southern cooking.  Excellent “13 au Jardin”.  These are all sidewalk cafes in normal time. (Sigh)

The Jardin is across the street and the trees are ready to pop open.  Gorgeous.

Then down Boulevard Saint Michel and Rue Racine (home) or go explore another street (like I did on Friday)and see the Pantheon in Paris. Wow!  BTW, that hamburger looks SOOOOO good to me.

I don’t know what the buildings are – except for the Pantheon,  and there is no one to ask. WELLLL, that is the main attraction, anyway, and I will find out eventually.  Also, I like to window shop.  At the end of the street, I know that is the Pantheon in Paris.

I then turned down Rue St Jacques past the University of Paris and the Sorbonne.  YES!!!  That is where I wanted to attend college in 1956-57.  Mother would not let me.  Now, it is too late.  Maybe.  Who knows.

On Friday, I got stopped by the police for my papers.  (My French friends tell me to be careful when this happens.  I could get robbed.  (sigh)) But, I trusted that this looked like the police and had seen them talking to other pedestrians and looking at their papers.  Every day we must have a paper saying who we are, where we live, and why we are out.  I had mine.  No problem.  And, I did not get robbed.  Haha.  On Saturday, the police were on horseback.  Gorgeous day. And, tomorrow is going to be warm.  Almost 70.  Springtime in Paris.  YES!!!

And, a few more pictures that I like.  That is the Museum de Cluny that I have yet to visit.  And, a small garden across from the Sorbonne.  And, a flower I found in a pot on the street.  But, you get the picture.

 

So for now, that is my story and I am sticking to it!  I am spending Spring 2020 in Paris during a World Wide pandemic.  And I now know where the Sorbonne is.  Down the street.  Haha.  Not exactly what I had in mind.  But, I like it!   Never a dull moment.

Best, Jay -(I am posting a picture of Craig (my son) because tomorrow is his birthday and I don’t dare take any selfies these days.  (Sigh)  He is a lot more good-looking but I am biased. I don’t know his story (a little) and I KNOW he doesn’t know mine.  He thinks he does, but all kids think they know their parents’ stories.  (Sigh).  But, I KNOW he is a lot more level-headed than I am.  Great!  Happy Birthday, Craig.  Stay safe.  I love you.)