When you know who you are
Other people can enter and exit your life
Without it rocking your world
As your foundation is solid and unshakeable
Because you have yourself.
When you know who you are
The opinions and judgements of others matter far less
And people can speak words of criticism, unkindness and malice about you
Without it affecting how you feel about yourself.
When you know who you are
Other people can reject you or abandon you
Without it changing your identity
Because you know that your destiny is not tied to those who have chosen to leave you
And you feel whole and complete from within.
When you know who you are
You appreciate
That putting your happiness and sense of self-worth
In the hands of another person
Is akin to making them your jailor
And remaining locked in a prison
That only they have the key to rescue you from
While liberating yourself
Means taking full responsibility
For your emotions, identity and wellbeing
And setting yourself free
To live and feel however you may choose.
And when you know who you are
Rather than devoting so much time and energy to trying to impress others
Or projecting the fulfilment of your own unmet needs and desires onto them
You choose to prioritise your own needs and wellbeing
And make time for your most important relationship
Which is with yourself.

August Begins…

Yes, this is the month that Steve died and went away forever and ever. I have no words to describe how I still feel and I now live in Paris. Trying to cope. Just sit with that thought ….

Best, Jay

Europe and August!

Do you go on a vacation in August? All of Europe goes somewhere else.

I don’t!

Another city. Another country.

I am not going anywhere because I am still working on my memory of what happened in August of 2016 in Nice, France

Steve died.

Who?

Steve Orlandella. My husband and the love of my life!! More later when I can think!

Best, Jay

Summertime

It’s summertime and don’t worry about your cares! Don’t leave anything for later. Later, the coffee gets cold. Later, you lose interest. Later, the day turns into night. Later, people grow up. Later, people grow old. Later, life goes by. Later, you regret not doing something… When you had the chance. Life is a fleeting dance, a delicate balance of moments that unfold before us, never to return in quite the same way again. Regret is a bitter pill to swallow, a weight that bears down upon the soul with the burden of missed chances and unspoken words. So, let us not leave anything for later. Let us seize the moments as they come, with hearts open and arms outstretched to embrace the possibilities that lie before us. For in the end, it is not the things we did that we regret, but the things we left undone, the words left unspoken, the dreams left unfulfilled.

Once Upon a Time…

Once upon a time, there lived a little girl named Janet.

She was very cute and really smart!  Everyone loved her and she loved them back but one day, she got tired of being so nice and she stopped!

The End

Wow! No cut and paste here.

Isn’t it weird how you can experience situations throughout your life that are so heartbreaking or stresstul that you can’t imagine ever being okay again. Then a few weeks, months or even years later, you notice that the days go by without you thinking about those times. You laugh, you smile, you go about your day and realise that you’re stronger and happier than you thought you ever could be again. Those bad times might always be in your mind, but you feel at peace with your past; and the memories that come back don’t punch you in the heart like they used to. You realise that you are, in fact, as strong as everyone was saying you were at the time, and that you would in fact get through what you went through. Isn’t it amazing how much we can change, how much we can learn, and how much we can grow.

Best, Jay

Life of Chaz

Books, games, music, and life — filtered through the mind of a writer, drummer, and philosopher who thinks too deeply about all of it. If it moves something in your chest, I'm interested.

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