THE GOOD NEWS V. THE BAD NEWS

Do you want the GOOD news or the BAD news?  Steve always wanted the BAD news first.  But, I choose to give you some GOOD news, so, here goes……Well, the GOOD news in this day and age of hourly “BREAKING (BAD) NEWS”, is that I am pondering another question of seemingly minimal importance compared to the life and death question of “Are we at nuclear war yet?” No, instead of wondering if I need a face mask for the nuclear fallout or do I just watch it approach over the horizon (more BAD news), I am pondering the question – how do I pay back this favor?  (The GOOD news) Let me explain.

I am receiving favours from people. Some are friends; others are strangers.  So, every time a favour crosses my path, I have to ask myself, “What is the sub-text?”  (my actress training) “What is really going on here?”  (my attorney training, too).  I also ask, “Do I accept this favor?”  and “If I do, what strings are attached?”  Because I think there are ALWAYS strings attached!  What do I mean?  Well, a “thank you” usually requires an implicit or explicit “you’re welcome” (in French, if possible).  OK, that is a very simplistic way of looking at it, but when you think about it, if someone does you a favor, you need to reciprocate in some way.  The trick comes in knowing the best way to do it.  It continually baffles me.  So, I end up guessing as to what strings are attached.  And, if I don’t guess correctly, there are consequences.  I foolishly think saying “thank you” will be enough, and it NEVER is.  I am still working on what will be enough in certain situations.  If I am lucky or smart enough to “guess” what is expected from me, I then have to examine whether I am willing to do that or not. Just plain old favours that you need, like, “Can I give you a ride to the luncheon in Mougins?”  Or, “Would you like for me to help you pack?” 

So, over-thinking becomes the norm.  I want to be appreciative, but I never know the best way to do that these days.  I want and need the favor, but I know that I must be ready and willing to reciprocate.  So, sometimes I say that I don’t need something because the only way I know to pay someone back is to take them to lunch or dinner or something that costs money.  And, that gets expensive. The French have different expectations than expats.  The British have others.  See what I mean?  But, I find – if I ask myself these questions, it seems to cover most people from most countries.

First question:  Is this really a “favor”?  And, if this person does me this “favour”, what, if anything, is expected back from me.  How am I going to reciprocate?  I keep reading memes on Facebook, wishing people would “just be nice”.  Just be kind.  Just be generous. Pay it forward.  I don’t find there are a lot of people who “pay it forward”.  Maybe.  Or maybe I am wrong.  Or, maybe it is my need to appear to be strong and independent, when I actually need a favor.  Hmmmm.  I must give that further consideration. Just sayin…..   And now, a few memes (4) to ponder, along with some cartoons for fun (5)…..

IMG-1951IMG-1519IMG-0019IMG-1673

IMG-2054IMG-1916IMG-0026IMG-0018

IMG-1915

 

Best, Jay

120

“TRUTH” AND CONSEQUENCES!

When I start out to write a post on the weekends, I usually lack inspiration.  However, during the week, that is all I can think about – saying “that should be a blog” or “great idea for a post!!”  This week, I was all excited about expounding on “truth”,  as in “There is SO much none of us will ever know.” (I was watching a program regarding what is “really” going on with our U.S. National Prayer Breakfasts.)  In retrospect, that seems like a “duh” moment.  Of course, there is so much we will NEVER know.  Maybe that is the good news.  And, the older I get, the more that becomes apparent.  That doesn’t keep me from wanting to know more each day, thinking that at some point, I will know what is “true”.  WRONG.  It is not going to happen.  I will just have to be satisfied with doing the best I can.  That is really all I can do anyway. 

Maybe that is the way it has always been.  We can choose what we want to believe. “Truth” doesn’t exist.  I am beginning to realize the power that gives me.  The bigger my world gets, the more I realize that I have the power to choose what I want to believe.  And, then deal with the consequences.  So, with that thought in mind, I will post these commentaries – without commentary.  Just know – somewhere within the non-commentary is my idea of “truth”, as I choose to believe it.  Haha.  At least, at this point in time.  It could change with a whim and without notice.  Just go with it!  A word of warning – DON’T TRY TO SELL ME ON YOUR VERSION OF TRUTH.  Chances are pretty good that I won’t buy it.  No, I reserve the right to choose what I want to believe, thank you.   

IMG-2050IMG-2008IMG-1997IMG-2037IMG-2025IMG-2018IMG-2038IMG-0002IMG-0005

I think this is a good time for me to say thank you to all of the people who have checked out these posts.  I really do appreciate it.  Of all the 20,000 words that I have written to date (WordPress has kept count! Haha), I have had 5,923 visitors from all over the world, 33,700 views.  Now, not everyone has “liked” my posts, but I am amazed that that many people have been curious.  Thank you very much.  I cannot promise that I will be different in the future.   Your guess is as good as mine.  We will all have to trust the inspiration of the moment.

Best, Jay

108+

AUGUST!!

Has anyone written a song about August?  At the moment, I cannot recall one.  I don’t know how I feel about August.  This is not new news.  It has never been a month that I look forward to – like June.  Or September.  Or October. Or April.  And, now, it causes me much angst.  It is the month that Steve was born; That Steve got sick and died; that Steve and I got married; that Steve was buried in Boston with his family; that I married Darrell MacIntyre; and that many “best and used-to-be best” friends have birthdays.  So, as a result, I am walking myself silly, trying to build my legs back to “normal” – whatever that is.

SO, some wonderful memories and some not-so-wonderful memories – all of them vivid in my mind’s eye.  It would be nice if I could just “move on”, but so far, I have not been able to do that.  Well, sorta.  So, in honor of Steve Orlandella and good friends, here are some dates and some pictures.

August 7:   Steve Orlandella and Jay W. MacIntosh got married in Las Vegas, Nevada.

wedding-steve-janet.jpg

August 9: Steve Orlandella was buried in Boston, MA, along side his family, per his wishes. IMG_1012

August 11:  Steve Orlandella was born in Boston, MA, to his mother and father, Vito and Therese Orlandella.

Steve as Baby

August 31:  Steve Orlandella died of heart failure at Hopital L’Archet in Nice, France.

Steve in hospital

Other dates:

August 7:  My friend Alice’s birthday.Alice

August 13: My friend Rosemary’s birthday.

unnamed

August 14:  My friend Carole’s birthday.

Janet-Carole-Joe November 2012

August 17:  My anniversary with Darrell William MacIntyre (my children’s father).

Grandparents 8-17-1957

These were dates that still hover in my mind every August.  Plus, there are many more August birthdays and events but these are foremost in my “days gone by” memory book because they were printed with indelible ink into my brain.  (Remember “indelible ink” – that dates me right there!! haha).    So this post is dedicated to all of those people who are part of my past in important ways.  Gone, but not forgotten.  And, they never will be.  Period, end of story!

Best, Jay

JayM2_1794.jpg

 

 

 

 

UPDATE! HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS!

I am now back home, trying to get things back to “normal”.  I was gone for a month.  That is a long time for plants, cleaning, and a cat.  I was lucky enough to have a friend to look after the cat and to water the plants, but we had extraordinary heat hit the area while I was away, and there is only so much that can be done to an apartment that is not air-conditioned.  So, everything suffered, including my friend.  Normally, July is not so hot – well, sorta, but this was exceptional.  And, I caught an infection in the rehab center that was circulating throughout the facility. So, it was tough. 

IMG-1796I immediately “overdid” when I arrived home on Monday morning.  But I managed to lick the infection and slowly – doing a “little bit” each day – have gotten things under control – sorta.

The EXCELLENT news is that I have had my one-month checkup with Dr. Mandrino; all x-rays have come back excellent; and he told me to drop the cane.  Period, end-of-story.  So, I have “girded my courage to the sticking place” and done it.  So far, I have made to the turn-around (3 blocks and back) and gone to the grocery story (next door) without problem.  I cannot tell you how happy that makes me.  My life has been on hold since September 27, 2018.  (sigh) Now, I can move forward once again (whatever that means).  I feel younger already!!

 

IMG-1328Missy has started purring again; the plants are thriving – sorta; and I have groceries in the house.  Another friend is helping me in other ways, with an air-conditioner and housekeeper.  And, a third friend helped me tremendously when I was in Rehab to get my medicine from home to help me with the infection. 

IMG-3215I am very blessed to have this help during my hour of need.  Now, I must find fun ways to repay each one of them.  It is important not to have “expectations”- of family, friends, acquaintances.  I delight when I am pleasantly surprised by a phone call or a word of encouragement.  Life is a delicate balance.  I guess that is a “duh” statement.  But, as I get older and really need help, it is important to have good friends.  Treat them with respect.

 

IMG-1581

Just saying……

IMG-1356

Best, Jay   

IMG-3241

SOME RANDOM THOUGHTS ON A SUNDAY MORNING….

On a very small scale, I find myself thinking about the time I have left on this planet.  How will I spend it – “God willing, and the Crick Don’t Rise”.  I won’t live to see the death, doom, and destruction that many are predicting for this world.  Maybe. I am already seeing the results of climate change.  I may see more than I think.  Who knows?  So, I don’t want to base my plans on fear, trying to “be safe”.   There is no such place.  Never was.  It is time to think about my “quality of life”.  Mother lived her last remaining days (18 years) in the comfort of her home, surrounded by “stuff” in a town where she had lived most of her life.  So did Mama Dorough.  So, did my sister Barbara and my sister Patricia.  Oops.  Not going to happen with me.  So, time to think about what I want in this last section. Now, you realize, I may not get to choose, but I want to start making some choices, even if all plans are smashed to smithereens. They were before, and probably will be again.  What kind of life do I want?  What “quality” of life?

IMG-1854

What quality of life? What’s that?  I woke up this morning thinking about what that means to me.  One of the last things that my son, Craig, said to me before he got on a plane to go back to California, was, “I don’t get it!  I just don’t get it.  Why are you here?”  I have no answer.  There is not a simple answer.  But, if I think about it, I wanted to improve my quality of life.  Steve did, too.  He did not like Los Angeles.  He particularly did not like the traffic – which was getting worse.

I did what I needed to do regarding my law practice, and we moved to Nice, France, for no good reason on October 1, 2015.  Why Nice?  Who knows! It seemed like an adventure waiting to happen.  He loved Monaco and Formula 1.  I loved Steve and France.  So, off we went!  Before August 2016, we shared Antibes, St. Tropez, San Remo, Monaco, Villefrance Sur Mer, Cannes, Cap Ferrat, Marseille, Aix en Provence, Sardinia, Vence, Paris, and nooks and crannies in Nice. It was fun and wonderful.  Plus, my two weeks in LA (a court case) with Patricia Rye.  Then, BAM!  Steve was Gone.  In a flash!

IMG-1673

As my Garmin would say, “Recalculating”.  Now, we have a Major Kaleidoscopic Shift going on.  Actually, the world seems to be going through a Major Kaleidoscopic Shift!  What do I mean?

Before, when I was younger, I wanted position, power, money, attention, a beautiful home, expensive car.  Now, not so much.  I now want to be surrounded by trees, flowers.  I want to see the sky and the clouds.  I want a sweet cat.  I want a good croissant, fresh-squeezed orange juice, clean water, and a good cup of coffee.  I want to talk to people I enjoy.  I want to learn more about the world and other people.  I want to hear their stories.  Expand my horizons.

Fame no longer matters.  (I never thought I would say that!)  Money lets me get the apartment I want with a patio and a view of trees and go to the good restaurants.  My car just needs to work.  I want to be able to walk without a cane; sit by the Sea; buy some fresh peaches from a farmer at the market; take home 12 roses for the kitchen counter; feel the Mediterranean on my head, as I duck under water.  I want to have energy; browse in Galleries Lafayette; try on an Armani suit.  Buy a Calvin Klein pair of slacks.  Get a Donna Karen blazer.  Get some Chanel lipstick.  Well, maybe all of that takes more money than my retired budget.  Well, then, make choices.  Get some of it, not all of it.  Go to a cabaret to hear good local music.  Buy sandals and pretty sun dresses.  Laugh a lot.  I can do a lot of that here.  The French enjoy life.  I see them talking to each other over a glass of wine.  Happy faces.  The men love their children.  I see them with their kids in the park.  Playing together.

IMG-1654

OK.  It is not perfect. But, it is pretty damn good.  And, I am left to my own devices.  People are friendly and nice.  Not great, because I don’t speak their language, but I speak enough to get by.  And, I have offers to help me coming from everyone.  The man in the dress shop; Caroline’s father (who wants to learn English), the French lady at this Centre who lives in Liberation who likes me and wants me to be more patient and more reasonable. Haha.  (I was angry because they wouldn’t let me go home on Friday.)

What am I trying to say?  That, since I moved to France, life has forced me to let go – of just about everything I once held in high esteem.  My country is not the same; my family is not the same; a lot of my friends have fallen by the wayside.  And, here I am.  Looking forward to returning home to a hot apartment in a mediocre building in a mediocre section of Nice, France; and selling my reliable Mini-Cooper.  Between you and me, I now appreciate more than ever what I have and what I had. I feel quite blessed to live by the Sea in a beautiful part of this world with friends to help me if I ask.  I plan to water my plants, hug my cat, put on my favorite jewelry (diamond studs for my ears and my diamond cross for my neck), buy some croissants from my favorite bakery, and enjoy being back home.  Then, we will see what is next.  Who knows?  Stay tuned……

unnamed.jpg

Now, you realize that all of this is subject to change without notice!!!  Haha.  Just saying…….

Best, Jay

125

THIS IS MY WORLD AND WELCOME TO IT – AGAIN!!!

In  my Universal Bubble here, I am into my third week of recovery at La Serena Convalescence Center here in Nice, France, after my second knee replacement surgery, on June 27, 2019. A bit of background to connect the dots (Remember Connecting the dots when you were a child?)  I had a knee replacement on September 27, 2018, because I had lost most of the cartilage in my right knee and was having difficulty walking, especially going up and down steps.  (My left knee also has problems, but it is better than my right.)  My general practitioner referred me to Dr. Olivier Castillo, telling me he was an excellent Orthopaedic Surgeon. I liked Dr. Castillo and got the shots in both knees in January 2017 and 2018.  It helped but I still had problems. So, I made the decision to have the knee replacement surgery in September 2018, which I did.  It was very expensive for me. 

Nothing seemed to be going right.  Lots of pain and limping.  My right knee turned out and my right leg seemed shorter than my left.  It got worse.  Well-meaning friends would scold me for limping and encourage me to walk more.  Every time I saw Dr. Castillo, I complained about the limp and the pain.  And, he would scold me for not walking more and tell me to drop the cane and walk at least 40 minutes EVERY day.  He would test my ability to flex my knee. I had excellent flexibility.  He would exclaim, “SUPER”.  Dictate something in French into his computer, and tell me to come back in a month and charge me. 55 euros for the visit.  Needless to say, I was discouraged.  I could not walk without a cane.  And, I had a limp and lots of pain.  

Before my six month checkup, I had to get X-rays.  When, I got them, I was shocked to see that I was right – the knees had very different numbers. No wonder I had a limp.  I showed the x-rays to friends and ALL of them encouraged me to get a second opinion.  I decided to see Dr. Castillo for my six-month checkup in March 2019 before doing so (getting a second opinion), and he looked at my x-rays.  I told him I could not walk without a cane and had a lot of pain.  He asked me to flex.  I could flex.  No problem. I just could NOT walk.  That is when Dr. Castillo made a choice.  To address the problem or to sweep it under the table. In my opinion, he made the wrong  choice.  He swept it under the table by ignoring it as a problem. He exclaimed, “SUPER!”  Told me to take something for my pain and that he would see me in six months. 

I left his office, made an appointment to see my general practitioner, got a referral to see Dr. Alain Mandrino, an expert’s expert, (the referral is a requirement in France for it to be covered by the French Medical Plan), made an appointment with Dr. Mandrino for late April 2019. He did not have an opening for almost 4 weeks.  When I finally saw him, he looked at the same x-rays that Dr. Castillo had seen.  He got a measuring instrument of some sort.  Wrote down something and turned to me.  He said words to the effect, “your knees are 13 degrees off.  The prothesis is incorrect for a woman of your age and is doing damage to your leg every time you walk on it.  It must be replaced as soon as possible. ”  I set a date for late June (June 27) because my son and daughter-in-law were coming to Nice in June. I wanted to be able to get around while they were here.   

Craig and Jean came in June.  I was able to do a few things with them. And, I had a two-hour surgery on June 27, with Dr. Mandrino.  He repaired and replaced my right knee Prothesis.  After the surgery, he explained to me what had happened and showed me the x-rays taken by the Hospital just before the surgery.  So, I had before and after x-rays.  There it was!  Clear as a bell.  The wrong prothesis had pushed bone out of place, turned my leg to the right, and was damaging my entire body as I tried to compensate in order to move.  It would not fix itself.  It would get worse over time.  I WAS PERMANENTLY LAME.  I am still trying to process this unfortunate happenstance of events.

IMG-1506 copy

All of this has been very expensive.  I do not have this kind of money.  And, as an attorney, my first thought has been to sue.  But, French law is completely unknown to me.  So, I will give this time and attention after I get better and try to figure out finances.  Do French attorneys do work on a contingency?  I hope so.  And, as Paul Harvey would say, “And now, you know the rest of the story!!”  (Remember Paul Harvey?  Am I dating myself?  So?)

I cannot say enough good things about La Serena Convalescence Center.  This is my second time here.  I don’t know what happened, but last time, it was terrible.  Now, it is terrific.  It could be that I have changed, but it also seems like the Center has made improvements.  I was here in October 2018, and I was miserable. the staff was unpleasant, and the food was terrible.  I did not like my surgeon or my therapist.  I had daily disputes with many of the nurses and a run-in with the head nurse.  One thing- the Room with a View was great.  Other than that, I would rate it  C-  .

This time, I rate it A+ .  The Room with a View is still great (different room).  The staff is friendly; the room is air-conditioned with a patio and a view, AND the food is excellent.  Frankly, I think they have a new director, new Staff doctors and a different dietician.  Now, granted, it could be that I have changed and have become more “French” so I have different expectations.  But, I think it is more than that.  Plus, last time, I did not like my surgeon.  This time, I have a different surgeon.  Last time, I did not like my physical therapist – arrogant man with an attitude.  Ugh.  This time, I like my therapist.  She seems to know what she is doing.  So, a lot depends on the luck of the draw.  Or, maybe it is the respect for the referring surgeon – his office makes all of the reservations for their patients. Ugh. Talk about lack of control.  Doctors have a lot of power in France.  Maybe they have a lot of power in the U.S.  But, here, it seems different. In the States, I have a better feel for things.  I am in a learning curve, here.  Slowly but surely.  

Now, the decision is when to go home.  Sooner or later.  I will probably go home sooner because I want to.  The better decision would be to go home later.  Do more therapy. Walk more here. Let the excellent staff tend to me.  As I said, I will probably go home sooner because I want to.  After that, I am on my own.  No medicine.  No one to clean my room, no excellent therapy, no room visits by doctors and nurses. No one to take my blood pressure or temperature.  No three hot excellent meals a day.  Am I crazy?  Well, maybe not crazy, but a tad head-strong.  I miss Missy. 

IMG-1212

I miss my patio and my refrigerator. I don’t miss the heat and grocery shopping.  But, all that said, I will probably go home as soon as the stitches are out.  Why?  Because I want to.  And once I get home, I will try to remember how to walk – again!!  Without a cane.  At least, 40 minutes every day!!  Find a good therapist.  Or use the one I used before.  I sort of like her.  Not great. Not terrible.  She could not help me.  My problem before, as it was, was not fixable as it was. It is now fixed!!  My legs match!! I can walk (slowly) without a cane!!

So, now on to what is next.  First, lots of patience working with myself and relearning how to do the basics – walk, go out at night, go up and down steps, wear sandals, grocery shop. We are reinventing the wheel here.  Going full circle.   Then, once I can do basics (hopefully, six months or so), focus on moving to Paris. That is where I always wanted to be, since Day 1.  Now, everyone here (in Nice), says, “Why Paris?  The weather is terrible; the city has changed; you will be sorry.

Well, when I moved to Los Angeles from Gainesville, Georgia, I did not love Los Angeles.  The weather was/is nice but far from perfect.  The city was a mess with lots of smog  (1968).  The country was a mess, what with the flower children, drugs, and the Viet Nam War.  I did not go there because I “liked” it.  I went there because it had what I needed – I needed to get my PhD in Theatre History and I had been accepted by UCLA graduate school (one of the few graduate schools  in the U.S. that had a PhD in Drama (Theatre History)) at that time. And, I held a teaching position in a branch of the University of Georgia that was a PhD position. I had to have a Ph.D.   Also, I had secret aspirations of becoming an actress in professional film and television.  I could either go to Los Angeles or New York.  Mother did not want me moving her grandchildren to New York.  It wasn’t “safe” there.  As if Los Angeles were safe.  Haha.  NOT!!  So, I moved to Los Angeles.  

Why Paris?  … because it has what I need.  I LOVE Nice.  Nice was Steve’s love.  Paris has always been mine.   Let’s face it.  I am in the final years of my life.  I cannot waste time.  I still want to see, to learn, to meet people, to explore.  I NEED to engage in life more before I engage in death.  Steve’s unexpected death knocked the wind out of my sails.  That, and two knee surgeries because of incompetence.  But, it has now been four years, three years since his death.  That is long enough to be in a rut.  Time to make hay while the sun shines.  Or something like that.  I and my “mixed metaphors”.  As Daddy would say, “Rough seas make good sailors.”  So, while we are reinventing the wheel and going full circle here, except for unforeseen circumstances, Paris is next!!! For better or for worse.  Stay tuned……

P.S.  I have more pictures that I have tried to upload, but something is going on with WordPress.  It won’t accept the uploads. (sigh)

BEST, JAY

129

Writer’s Quote Wednesday: Dorothy Thompson

This a re-blog from a post by my niece, Deb Prince Kroll.  I like it and now I share it with you.  Deb’s blog is http://www.unexpectedincommonhours.wordpress.com

unexpectedincommonhours's avatarUnexpected in common hours


American journalist and news broadcaster Dorothy Thompson (July 9, 1893 – January 30, 1961) was one of the most respected women of her time. The first woman to head a foreign news bureau of any importance, she met and interviewed Adolf Hitler in 1931, and three years later became the first journalist to be expelled from Nazi Germany. Featured on the cover of Time magazine in 1939, Thompson was declared to be, along with Eleanor Roosevelt, one of the most influential women in the U.S. In addition to writing for several publications and broadcasting for NBC radio, she authored over 20 books.


“No people ever recognize their dictator in advance. He never stands for election on the platform of dictatorship. He always represents himself as the instrument [of] the Incorporated National Will. … When our dictator turns up you can depend on it that he will be one of the…

View original post 52 more words

ANTHONY BOURDAIN (1956 – 2018)

I came upon this article in a unusual way – by way of Facebook, in the middle of the night, unable to sleep in an uncomfortable bed at my Convalescence Center after my second knee surgery on June 27th.  (The Universe is teaching me the art of patience AGAIN and AGAIN!  Patience is not my strong suit!!)  Anthony Bourdain’s thoughts about travel.  Actually, I was not familiar with Bourdain prior to his death.  I have subsequently come to know him through his work and the world’s admiration of this man.  Why did he want to die?  Such an extraordinary man!  What happened that caused him so much despair?  That thought plagues me often.  Anyway, I saved this post because I think it is something to share. 

This was written by MAYA KACHROO-LEVINE for the online version of Travel and Leisure. 

“I have printed out copy of Anthony Bourdain’s first New Yorker article, “Don’t Eat Before Reading This”, in my desk drawer. Sometimes I forget it’s there, and sometimes it gets crushed by external hard drives, travel brochures, or extraneous chords. But every so often, when I’m sick of working, I’ll clean out my desk and start reading the crumpled pages. And almost instantly, I am thrown by the way Bourdain sculpts sentences, by his matter-of-fact humor, and by how timeless his words are. Bourdain’s work hooks me instantly, and offers answers to questions I didn’t even know I had.

Much of Anthony Bourdain’s writing advocates for experiencing culture through food, and exploring the lesser-known sights of new cities. And those ideas have helped informed how I travel.  Whether you’re a fan of his written work and are searching for “Kitchen Confidential” quotes, or you’re more partial to watching Parts Unknown, there’s a piece of his wisdom to suit every appetite. These 52 Anthony Bourdain quotes about life will broaden your travel horizons and inspire you on your next journey.

“It seems that the more places I see and experience, the bigger I realize the world to be. The more I become aware of, the more I realize how relatively little I know of it, how many places I have still to go, how much more there is to learn.”

“Travel changes you. As you move through this life and this world you change things slightly, you leave marks behind, however small. And in return, life — and travel — leaves marks on you.”

“The journey is part of the experience — an expression of the seriousness of one’s intent. One doesn’t take the A train to Mecca.”

“If you’re twenty-two, physically fit, hungry to learn and be better, I urge you to travel – as far and as widely as possible. Sleep on floors if you have to. Find out how other people live and eat and cook. Learn from them — wherever you go.”

“If I’m an advocate for anything, it’s to move. As far as you can, as much as you can. Across the ocean, or simply across the river. The extent to which you can walk in someone else’s shoes or at least eat their food, it’s a plus for everybody. Open your mind, get up off the couch, move.”

“Travel is about the gorgeous feeling of teetering in the unknown.”

“Travel isn’t always pretty. It isn’t always comfortable. Sometimes it hurts, it even breaks your heart. But that’s okay. The journey changes you; it should change you. It leaves marks on your memory, on your consciousness, on your heart, and on your body. You take something with you. Hopefully, you leave something good behind.”

“It’s an irritating reality that many places and events defy description. Angkor Wat and Machu Picchu, for instance, seem to demand silence, like a love affair you can never talk about. For a while after, you fumble for words, trying vainly to assemble a private narrative, an explanation, a comfortable way to frame where you’ve been and what’s happened. In the end, you’re just happy you were there — with your eyes open — and lived to see it.”

“I’m a big believer in winging it. I’m a big believer that you’re never going to find perfect city travel experience or the perfect meal without a constant willingness to experience a bad one. Letting the happy accident happen is what a lot of vacation itineraries miss, I think, and I’m always trying to push people to allow those things to happen rather than stick to some rigid itinerary.”

“Do we really want to travel in hermetically sealed popemobiles through the rural provinces of France, Mexico and the Far East, eating only in Hard Rock Cafes and McDonald’s? Or do we want to eat without fear, tearing into the local stew, the humble taqueria’s mystery meat, the sincerely offered gift of a lightly grilled fish head?”

“Drink heavily with locals whenever possible.”

“Nothing unexpected or wonderful is likely to happen if you have an itinerary in Paris filled with the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower.”

“Plans should be ephemeral, so be prepared to move away from them.”

“You learn a lot about someone when you share a meal together.”

“Barbecue may not be the road to world peace, but it’s a start.”

“Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”

“I, personally, think there is a real danger of taking food too seriously. Food should be part of the bigger picture.”

“I think food, culture, people and landscape are all absolutely inseparable.”

“The mishandling of food and equipment with panache was always admired; to some extent, this remains true to this day.”

“I learned a long time ago that trying to micromanage the perfect vacation is always a disaster. That leads to terrible times.”

“I’ve long believed that good food, good eating, is all about risk. Whether we’re talking about unpasteurized Stilton, raw oysters or working for organized crime ‘associates,’ food, for me, has always been an adventure”

“Good food is very often, even most often, simple food.”

“An egg in anything makes it better.”

“But I do think the idea that basic cooking skills are a virtue, that the ability to feed yourself and a few others with proficiency should be taught to every young man and woman as a fundamental skill, should become as vital to growing up as learning to wipe one’s own ass, cross the street by oneself, or be trusted with money.”

“The way you make an omelet reveals your character.”

“An ounce of sauce covers a multitude of sins.”

“And now to sleep, to dream. . . perchance to fart.”

“Food is everything we are. It’s an extension of nationalist feeling, ethnic feeling, your personal history, your province, your region, your tribe, your grandma. It’s inseparable from those from the get-go.”

“Meals make the society, hold the fabric together in lots of ways that were charming and interesting and intoxicating to me. The perfect meal, or the best meals, occur in a context that frequently has very little to do with the food itself.”

“For me, the cooking life has been a long love affair, with moments both sublime and ridiculous.”

“You have to be romantic to invest yourself, your money, and your time in cheese.”

“Generally speaking, the good stuff comes in on Tuesday: the seafood is fresh, the supply of prepared food is new, and the chef, presumably, is relaxed after his day off.”

“You can dress brunch up with all the focaccia, smoked salmon, and caviar in the world, but it’s still breakfast.”

“I am not afraid to look like an idiot.”

“There is no Final Resting Place of the Mind.”

“I’m through being cool. Or, more accurately, I’m through entertaining the notion that anybody could even consider the possibility of coolness emanating from or residing anywhere near me.”

“Skills can be taught. Character you either have or you don’t have.”

“Luck is not a business model.”

“But I’m simply not going to deceive anybody about the life as I’ve seen it. It’s all here: the good, the bad and the ugly.”

“I don’t have to agree with you to like you or respect you.”

“If you’re a writer, particularly if you’re a writer or a storyteller of any kind, there is something already kind of monstrously wrong with you.”

“If I believe in anything, it is doubt. The root cause of all life’s problems is looking for a simple f—ing answer.”

“Perhaps wisdom. . . is realizing how small I am, and unwise, and how far I have yet to go.”

“Without new ideas, success can become stale.”

“What are our expectations? Which of the things we desire are within reach? If not now, when? And will there be some left for me?”

“Give the people you work with or deal with or have relationships with the respect to show up at the time you said you were going to. And by that I mean, every day, always and forever. Always be on time.”

“I have a tattoo on my arm, that says, in ancient Greek, ‘I am certain of nothing.’ I think that’s a good operating principle. ‘ ”

Anthony Bourdain
Discovery Channel/Kobal/REX/Shutterstock
Anthony Bourdain Quotes about Life

BY MAYA KACHROO-LEVINE ,  TRAVELANDLEISURE.COM

JUNE 25, 2019

 

Best, Jay

105

THE SIXTH OF JULY! CARTOONS & NO COMMENTARY!!

BACK WHEN (1978) when I was having a love affair with the theatre and acting, I saw a play at the Mark Taper Forum in Los Angeles.  It made a lasting impression on me.  I thought about it a lot yesterday. Actually, ever since then, I think of it every fifth of July – the day after the Fourth!  Fifth of July is a 1978 play by Lanford Wilson. Set in rural Missouri in 1977, it revolves around the Talley family and their friends, and focuses on the disillusionment in the wake of the Vietnam War. It premiered on Broadway in 1980 and was later produced as a made-for-television movie.  The play is part of the Talley Trilogy, a series of Wilson plays revolving around the Talley family of Lebanon, Missouri. The other plays, both set on July 4, 1944, are Talley’s Folly, a one-act dialogue between Sally Talley and her husband-to-be, Matthew Friedman, and Talley & Son, the story of a power struggle between Sally’s father and grandfather.  Ah, I love theater and theater people.  Through art, always trying to make the world a better place!!!

Today, it is the sixth of July!!  I hesitate to write this blog because – what with 7.1 earthquakes, U.S. tanks, airports in the Revolutionary War, a Seaview, hot dogs, and baseball, I feel guilty sitting in a bubble in a convalescence center here in Nice, being waited on by doctors and nurses “hand and foot”.  I really am at a loss for words.  Well, not really.  I am NEVER at a loss of words.  Many times, I feel it is better to keep my mouth shut, because —- well, because there is a limit to what I can do and I am an expat. So, I am posting things that make commentary with little to NO COMMENTARY from me.  Many times, that is the most effective way to say what is in my heart. 

IMG-1770

IMG-1767IMG-1765IMG-1724IMG-1680IMG-1687IMG-1689IMG-1720IMG-1729

IMG-1513IMG-1673IMG-1691IMG-1355.JPGIMG-1600

IMG-1771IMG-1354

IMG-1654

Best, Jay

unnamed.jpg

 

UPDATE – WONDERFUL MOMENTS aka MIRACLES! -“SIX DAYS IN JUNE, 2019”

YES!!  Six wonderful days in June!!  I loved every moment.  The arrival, the family dinners, and the farewell.  Those moments were precious to me.  Just knowing they were down the street was comforting to me.  Getting to hug them both.  Seeing their happy faces in the pictures they were posting for friends back home.  It all made me very happy and gave me memories that I will keep in my heart forever.  The back story is long and arduous.  More than I will write in this blog.  But, to see my son at age 58, a successful  business man, coming across the street with his beautiful wife Jean and a big suitcase made my heart leap with joy.  

IMG-1451IMG-1446IMG-1448IMG-1459 I did not know how they would like Nice or France or French ways of doing things.  No problems at all.  They explored, met people, traveled on the train to Monaco, and maximized every moment. 

IMG-1494IMG-1488

IMG-1485

IMG-1484IMG-1479AND, they walked everywhere (except for the train to  Monaco), ate when they got hungry and swam (in the Sea) when they felt like it! IMG-1532IMG-1543IMG-1507IMG-1463

 

When you live here like I do (almost four years), it is quite different. My lifestyle has settled down to a routine.  But, Steve and I explored like that when we arrived.  And, I think they had fun and will, hopefully, have good memories.  I know they were glad to go home.  Haha.  They were exhausted from all that exercise.  But, nothing slowed them down.  (By the way, I cannot take credit for ANY of the photography.  I did not feel like taking pictures.  I was memorizing looks, smiles, and faces – all special to me during that weekend when time stopped for me. 

IMG-1494 copyIMG-1503IMG-1509

IMG-1506 copy

Best, Jay

129

 

 

 

POETRY

| WRITTEN BY KRAGE

Poetry Pop Poetry Blog

Put a pop of poetry in your day!

Rattle: Poetry

… without pretension since 1995.

Living Poetry

A group of poets and poetry readers.

Poetry Blog

I write poetry to express what's on my mind or how I feel

Poetry For Healing

Finding Your Words

New Zealand Poetry Society

Supporting and promoting poets and poetry in New Zealand

You And Poetry

Dear Stranger

Poetry Breakfast

Serving a little poetic nourishment Monday thru Friday and featuring a Short Play Saturday Matinee to read.

Poetry Academe

Your sole poetry school

Morning Star Poetry

Light shall shine out of darkness!

DAYS OF OUR LIVES

The days of our lives

JAYSPEAK

Welcome to My World!

WORDKET

-Chase the Stories

RL WEB

MAKING LIFE BETTER

Chris Rogers The Actor

SAG-AFTRA Actor, WordPress Presenter, & Public Speaker